Help!! Depression!!

Chey • Boss wife 👑 Boss mom 👩‍👧

So I've been dealing with depression a lot lately and it seems to be worse than before, I don't have money to see a psychologist because they cost a lot where I live and honestly, I don't know how to begin to get myself out of it... I SHOULD be happy because I've been blessed with a beautiful daughter and a handsome husband, but lately my husband and I aren't close... I've been pushing him away, I feel he doesn't understand what I'm going through, I feel he hates me and that he doesn't want me anymore even tho in my heart I know he loves me... I feel so worthless like I should just disappear like things would be better off and I don't want to feel this way anymore I try to let my husband know how much I truly appreciate him, but I feel I'm not doing it as much as I should... I've blocked him out and feel as if we're roommates and not lovers. I feel like such a failure. I should be happy because I have everything I've ever wanted... I hate feeling this way and I don't know what to do... Please give tips or ideas on beginning the first steps to helping myself... I want to be better.

How can I find myself again and become a good wife and mommy?.