I gained 60lbs during my pregnancy. I didn't go over the deep end on my eating and I still exercised (even did bootcamps) while pregnant. I obtained my personal training certification and nutrition certification while I was pregnant. I've been so ashamed of my postpartum body. I have always had body issues-been overweight my whole life. Several years ago I lost 100lbs, and gained about 30 of it back, but maintained that 70lb weight loss for 4 years until I got pregnant. But my postpartum body had given me worse self esteem than all my other years of being overweight. I told myself that I'd give myself grace for 1 year. To focus on being a mom and breastfeeding for 1 year and then go back to my regimen and lose the weight. Baby is 6 months old, currently. Well, my husband made a joke about my weight. I brought it up, saying I wanted us to eat better because i saw a snapchat someone took of me (on their story) and I was mortified. I wanted to start back on eating clean right away. And he started cracking up and said, "ya I saw the snapchat". I'm normally never upset over this. I always welcome his criticism and he is the one person I never want to disappoint. He is a good man a great father, and I'm so happy I get him. But man, I'm seriously hurt over this. I'm already disgusted and disappointed in myself. There are a million excuses why I weigh what I do now, I know. It just made me feel sick to my stomach. I have no idea who to reach out to. I know how to lose weight. I've done it before. I'm certified to help others do it. But I feel so defeated and overwhelmed with motherhood and I just started a new job and we moved states. I guess I'm here looking for encouragement. I want my body back so bad but I keep making excuses. And being shamed by someone I love and respect is super hard. Thanks for reading.