So a little backstory; my dad has been in a toxic relationship with my step-mother for 4 years. He met her when she was pregnant with another man’s baby (a deadbeat who disappeared when he found out she was pregnant). So my dad stepped up to the plate. He has been there for that baby since she was in her mother’s womb. She is just as much his daughter as I am, if not more, even though they don’t have a biological connection. That baby is 4 years old now and my dad loves her more than anybody in the world—even me, and everyone knows it. I’m 100% positive my little sister if the only reason my dad stayed with my step-mom for so long.

Back in September, about 2 weeks before my 18th birthday, I found out I was pregnant. I was living with my dad and step-mother at the time. My step mom (who is an entitled, controlling, conceited, evil excuse for a woman) reacted by trying to attack me and then kicking me out. My dad defended me and ever since then they have had major marital issues. She has kicked him out and invited him back in time and time again. They have been very on and off. And since then, my dad has been relapsing on meth, over and over again. When I was a baby, I didn’t even know my father because of this. Because he was always in and out of jail for grand theft auto, probation violation, possession of drugs, being under the influence of drugs, writing bad checks, etc. I barely knew my dad at all. And then when my little sister came into the world, suddenly he wanted to be clean and sober, and he has been, up until recently.

I just found out that my dad has officially gone off the deep end. He ripped apart all the blinds at his house, and then nailed blankets over all the windows. He left my little sister HOME ALONE for 2-3 hours at night, and then came home and nailed all the doors shut. My step mom had to file an emergency protection order. She said she was afraid he was gonna kill her.

Then, the next morning, low and behold, my red neck father crawled out a window so he could go deer hunting🤦🏻‍♀️ kill me, but i thought that was funny.

Anyway, now he’s posting on Facebook about needing an apartment and he’s been texting my boyfriend and I about needing help. Now I’m not a rookie when it comes to dealing with drug addict parents. Both my mom and dad have sobered up from meth only to relapse again multiple times over the years. So I’ve had my fair share of experience with this crap. I know that when an addict comes crying for help, you don’t help them. It’s like feeding raccoons—they’re just gonna keep coming back for more.

When my dad found out I was pregnant (despite that I was only 17) he was thrilled, over the moon about becoming a grandpa. My daughter is due in May, and my boyfriend and I have both decided that since he clearly can’t get his shit together, he won’t be allowed around our child. We were gonna let him come see Aubree (our baby) in the hospital when she arrives, but after hearing about what recently happened, we’re not so sure anymore.

Should we let him see the baby in the hospital, at the most?

I’m hoping telling him he can’t see Aubree will wake him up, but I don’t know at this point. I know that with an addict, you can’t make them want to recover. They have to truly want it for themselves, or it’s not gonna happen.

But at the same time, I can’t help but wonder what in the hell can I tell him that will wake him up enough to want that help? How do I handle this? In the most healthy way, for myself, and for my pregnancy.

Most of all I want my dad to be healthy. And I don’t want my daughter to ever be around a person who is on or withdrawing from drugs. Absolutely not. Her life will be different than mine in that way.

How do i handle this?