I’m not trying to bring down all the good feels of the new year but after the whirlwind of the holidays and getting so much stuff for the baby I need to rant for a minute. This may sound harsh but I am beyond exhausted so have some grace with me.

We live in a tiny apartment. We don’t have room for stuff we don’t use. We also practice minimalism so we are very intentional about only having things that are practical, align with our values or bring us joy. I’ve spent hours researching and carefully selecting the items on our registry. We’ve made it crystal clear to our family to follow it or things will likely get returned because we literally do not have the room.

They’ve followed the registry pretty well and I am so appreciative of that but we’ve still received tons of stuff we didn’t ask for or want despite communicating very openly about what would be helpful and why. I’m 29 weeks and feel like I’ve aged 40 years over the last trimester because of hip problems so I’m already tired before having to deal with returning, donating or finding a place to store stuff.

On top of that, my husband and I have gotten into several arguments about how to deal with the stuff because he’s just as stressed out as I am about it. And we are solid normally. He’s been great this entire pregnancy. It’s just wearing on us both and I’ve still got a baby shower to participate in. I’m worried I’m going to start sobbing as I open gifts because I’m already having anxiety about having to deal with returning stuff. I really want to see all the ladies that will be there so I don’t want to cancel out of anxiety.

I am not trying to sound ungrateful but we’ve asked for the absolute minimum of what we’ve needed and know exactly why we want everything we want for the baby. It’s not crazy expensive or outrageous stuff. We plan to buy the things we want regardless of the stuff people give us that’s sort of (but not really) similar.

I just wish people would follow the stupid registry. It doesn’t feel like we are getting gifts; at this point it feels like people are shoveling clutter on top of us and expecting that we will be happy about it.

I wasn’t naive to this. All my friends told me this would happen and it would be frustrating. I tried to mentally prepare myself but I didn’t realize how exhausting it would be. And if it’s so normal and frustrating for parents-to-be, why do we keep doing the same thing over and over to each other?

I know people’s intentions really are good and I’m sure some things we will be pleasantly surprised by. I do love that we have a great support system and I don’t want them to feel bad for trying to help but in the hard moments when hormones hit, I just want to drink wine, cry and start throwing crap out of the windows to not have to deal with it...and I can’t have the wine so I have to settle for cake 🍰.