long rant because I’m so fucking hurt and sad and this has been a depressing topic for years.

I’m 22 and I can’t fucking wait to move out. I get along fine with my dad but mom is near impossible to speak to.

I swear, she’s missing the ability to logic or reason through things, so communicating with her is really hard. For example, she will always talk over you, stop listening while you’re talking, or butt in and interrupt with something unrelated. So many arguments stem from her poor communication skills and once she’s mad, anything else is impossible.

If we’re in an argument, it usually ends in her ranting “to herself” i.e. LOUDLY saying things to herself, usually shit talking me (how bad I am at this and that etc). Always about me. “Under her breath” is BS, I can hear it clear as day. Sometimes it’s loud enough from the other room and I’ll think she’s talking to me and then I’ll answer, and then she’ll get pissed off and say “you’re trying to have the last word again, ha? You always trying to have the last word?” Which is literally not what I’m trying to do, I’m genuinely answering her sometimes.

Other times when shes ranting she just says the rudest, meanest things about me “under her breath” and I can’t take it, it’s so hurtful and I have to ask her to please stop. But then she thinks I’m trying to “shut her up” which is kind of true, because it hurts to listen her be so mean to me. It’s the most disrespectful shit.

She said to me today in an argument that “i can say whatever I want, I’m the mom”. I mean I guess??? But it baffles me how she can say the meanest shit to me and not care. Or she sees that it hurts me, and doesn’t care. I get that I’m her daughter, but I’m still a human being with feelings.

Example: sometimes I try to calm myself down when arguing with her about something, JUST so she can’t come back and say that I was raising my voice or that I had attitude. No matter what I say, she’ll do this sarcastic thing and say so, so sarcastically “oh yes my daughter, my darrrrling daughter, I’m so sorry my daughter”. There have been times where she literally gets down on her knees and says this shit, or says “okay, you’re the mother, im the daughter” and I’m just like, what the fuck, seriously, can we just TALK???

the stuff she does and says makes me feel so belittled, disrespected, and worthless. She shows no remorse for anything she says. If I show that I’m sad or if I cry, I’m overreacting (no, i don’t cry often).

Yes I’ve tried asking if we could just talk. Yes I’ve tried talking to her after she’s cooled off and isn’t angry. But her stubbornness and pride and lack of logic skills gets in the way and conversation never goes well.

I envy all girls who are “best friends” with their moms. While those girls are so lucky, I can’t talk to my mom about jack shit. I just get disrespected and belittled by mine.

Just had to rant and let this out because I can’t keep holding it in anymore. I have no one to talk to about this. I can’t tell me dad because he’ll think I’m “being a girl” and being overly sensitive about things. I can’t tell my mom how I feel or that she hurts me because she’ll just think I’m being “dramatic”. 😞