After a year and a half of ttc, I finally got my BFP. My husband and I celebrated. I told my mom and she celebrated. A few days before my doctors appointment, I woke up to sharp pains in my stomach and back. I ran to the bathroom and I knew my baby was gone. I took tests everyday and eventually they got lighter and lighter. Now there’s nothing. I’ve cried everyday. My husband was amazing. A few weeks have passed and everyone is telling me to cheer up and that we can try again. I’m ovulating in a week and i’m not excited about trying again. I’m scared. I’m sad. I’ve been putting a smile on my face and acting excited about trying again but I just feel like curling up into a ball and crying. I don’t know if I’m overreacting because I didn’t even have a chance to see my baby or hear a heartbeat but my heart is broken. From the moment I knew he/she was there, I was planning and dreaming of this baby. A baby that I will never hold.

I feel like I can’t be sad because everyone else has moved on. Like I’m stupid to dwell on this. Yes, I can try again and have a baby but my heart can’t forget this one...💔