How to cut of a toxic parent?

This is a really long story. So my dad growing up was very abusive physically and emotionally . My mom did very little to stop it and anytime anyone in the family brought it up , they’d say “oh well we got whipped when we were kids” and my mom would defend my dad and chose him over all her kids. I have an older sister who has a different dad . But when she was living with my mom he would beat her to and she has a lot of issues now that I think stemmed from that. (We aren’t close at all anymore) . My junior and senior year got better he wasn’t physically abusive anymore but still emotionally abusive. He’s such a religious man which kills me that he can treat his kids like shit but still be “by the Bible” I have a hard time wondering if it’s right to cut him off . He did provide for us kids financially . But nothing more then he had to. (He’s a cop) . I’m married now and live across the country away from my parents . Every time I FaceTime my mom he’s always in the back round with his negative comments . Such as “what are you even doing with your life” and are you “just gonna sit on your ass your whole life” and he will say stuff like “you need Jesus “ mind you I actually am working and have intentions to go to vet tech school and his comments are “oh so your gonna make a living off 12 dollars an hour your an idiot” my husband is a marine we are young and both 20. My “dad” has never been supportive and give me crazy amounts of anxiety and never helps with money in anyway not that I would even ask for a dime from him but they haven’t even came out to visit me but they have money to go everywhere else across the US for vacation. I also do deep down blame my mom for not sticking up for us kids growing up, but then again my mom was best by her stepdad and her mom never defended her so I feel like she just doesn’t have strength and was never taught how to be a good mom. My brother is 14 and he’s autistic my dad doesn’t hit him my mom has always catered my brother like her baby but not us girls which I’m glad for, I love my brother with all my heart and would actually fuck my dad up if he ever laid a hand on him. I’m worried if I cut my dad off I won’t have a relationship with my brother and when they pass away I don’t want them to send him to a home or something because we don’t have any other close family who could take care of him. So I want him to live with me instead of in some home. Advice ? How can I cut my father off .