My fiancé and I eloped recently and just made the announcement to family. It did not go well. I understand being a bit sad that you missed the big day, are they going overboard considering the circumstances? Am I missing something here?

Background on my parents: my mom hated my fiancé from the minute she saw him. I was pregnant and hormonal when she tried to stop our small wedding. Cried and begged me not to go through with it. I was traumatized and did not go through with it. She continued to make my pregnancy a nightmare and even though she didn’t want me marrying him, called me a whore many times behind my back for being pregnant out of wedlock and “living in sin”

She didn’t stop bullying me until she was good and ready (almost my third trimester) To this day she rarely acknowledges my guy’s presence.

Fast forward, I’ve given birth and we decide it’s time. I need new health insurance (he has a good one via his job) and why not? We’re living as a family after all. We do a quick ceremony just the two of us with the thought that later down the line we will have a church wedding. I was hoping by that time my mom would have come around.

So when I tell my parents, I expect slight disappointment but a discussion on when to start planning for the big day. Well, my mom has gone radio silent and my dad flipped out. He is accusing me of not considering him family...basically making this about them. I’m at a loss. Should I finally just cut my toxic family off or wait for tempers to cool?

Update: They sensed they were about to lose me and have now dropped the issue. But it’s left a horrible taste in my mouth 🤢