I don’t think I’m okay anymore

Hi all, sorry but I don’t know who else to talk to or reach out to.

My little girl is 18 weeks 5 days old now and Ive never felt so down and anxious ever before. I’ve suffered from anxiety for a while and it was medicated before falling pregnant but I came off meds due to weight gain etc that in turn made me fall into a depression.

My relationship with my boyfriend is basically non existent at this point - he said he can no longer handle me the way that I am he says I am acting controlling (I honestly don’t think that I am) and I am too much hard work. I feel so anxious when I’m alone and we don’t live together but my brain doesn’t seem to process that he has a life outside of me and my heart pounds.

I have now been feeling ill for 4 days and haven’t eaten much other than a sandwich and 1 round of toast since then. My inhalers don’t seem to even be helping me when the hyperventilating worsens and I just feel generally horrid.

I don’t have family who I can open up to purely because I’ve never felt able to plus I don’t like them becoming involved in mine and my partners relationship.

I don’t really know why I posted this here but I no longer know what to do or have anybody to talk to but I just needed to get it off my chest and to know that things will get better😪