Am I the only one not wanting to through a huge first birthday party for my son??

My beautiful boy will be one in March and since the beginning my husband and I have held off on baptism until he is at an age where he can understand what’s going on. And that has been such a problem apparently because our entire families make it well known they disapprove.

And now apparently I’m supposed to have this huge elaborate birthday party already being planned for my son but I haven’t even thought of doing a huge party. I don’t see the point in making it a huge event that will probably just overwhelm him. I’d rather a nice intimate family party to celebrate his life. Nothing fancy just full of love.

Both my mom and my entire inlaw side has been shaming me for not wanting to do the huge first birthday party calling me selfish?

But I’m trying to think practically and stay true to what me and my husband prefer and believe in.

Am I in the wrong here? Is it selfish if me?