I’ve been collecting rainbows for the last few months because of the new found meaning I have because of this site. We weathered quite a storm. In June we had our fourth baby, a beautiful baby boy. Unfortunately he was born chronically ill(not sure if those are the right word to use). The day after Thanksgiving he passed away in his sleep between my husband and I. He was with us for a little shy of 6 months and every day he was with us we loved him the best way we could. In no way shape or form was it an easy 6 months, lots of sleepless nights caring for him. I became more then just his mommy, being his own personal 24 hour in home nurse. I handled all of his care, and it was an around the clock job.

Like I said I have rainbows hanging around the house now as we need a rainbow at the end of this storm. A lot of every mothers worst nightmares have come true in our lives and I worry the next may be not being able to conceive a healthy child. I don’t know what I believe any more but I know I need to have hope for the future, for myself and my other children. It has been a very very dark 8 months.

But today out of the blue my sweet boy said to me (not knowing anything about our meaning of a rainbow) “I’m going to draw you a rainbow!”

I think it’s a beautiful little rainbow and in my heart I have to have hope that maybe it’s a sign, like everyone else hopes for on here.