My husband died..

We met when I was 14 and were married on our 10 year anniversary. Our 2 year marriage anniversary was on 1/30 and he passed on 2/1. I'm so sick. I can barely breathe. After almost 4 years of trying to have a baby, I finally gave birth last year April. Our son is only 9 months old and looks just like his dad. Everytime I look at him I want to break down, but I'm trying to be strong. I cant sleep at night. He needs to be with me and he's not. I cant eat. Im constantly smoking. His funeral is next week and I can't breathe. Its so hard to breathe. I just dont know how I could ever get through this. He was my bestfriend, my comfort, my home. Idk what to do.