Was I wrong for expressing my feelings🤔🤦🏾‍♀️😭

There’s this guy I’ve been knowing for about 8 months now. When I first met him I was in a relationship, but I continued conversing with him on a daily basis. Because of that I ended up ruining my relationship. After my ex and I broke up things started to get a bit serious between him and I. We started spending more time together and having sex at least 5-6 times a week. The more time I spent with him the more I was starting to have feelings for him. I’m 23 and he’s 33, this is someone I thought I could never be with because of our age difference. We’ve never been on date, I have met some of his family, and we’ve never been seen out in public together. There have been times where I wonder “Am I just sex to him?” I’ve been holding back telling him how I really feel because I’ve tried before and all I got was left on read. It’s like everytime I try to talk to him about something important he ignores me and I get so angry. Yesterday I sent him a very long detailed message. There were something’s I wish I could take back saying because now I don’t think he’ll talk to me again. I told him I hated him and hated the way he was treating me. I feel like I’m nothing but a joke to him and just some random girl he feels he can have sex with whenever he wants to. But I’m so weak for him; I texted him apologizing for what I said and I was left on read again. Seriously, was I wrong for expressing my feelings? Should I just let him go? Was I just a booty-call to him? Should I try to make things right? I’m so hurt and confused😭😭😭