Baby's Father is an Alcoholic Becoming Abusive Towards Me
** Originally I had this posted earlier today but it was moved to the domestic violence group and the others were removed. I wanted to repost because I need advice. **
My SO and I have been together for 6 years and we have an 18 month old son, Greyson. Greyson lives with me and my grandparents and we visit and stay the night with SO and his parents on the weekends. I'm a stay at home mom and a college student and he works on the weekdays.
I realized he was becoming an alcoholic right before I found out I was pregnant. For the past few years, he will drink until he blacks out and acts like a stranger I have never met before that hates me. I have been sexually abused in the past before I met him and he continues to try to push me into doing sexual acts I am uncomfortable with like anal. I have been cheated on when I was pregnant and after, just found out recently. He has become verbally, emotionally, and rarely, physically abusive.
This weekend me and Greyson went to stay with his parents and everything seemed alright until Friday night. I'm not sure if he was drinking while we were in a different room but he kept saying that we never really spend time together anymore and when it was time for the Baby to take a nap, I thought I would rock him to sleep then we could spend time together. But while rocking him, my SO came in the room and spit all over my face. I went to wash my face and asked what was going on, why would he do that to me.
The first answer he gave me was that he wanted me to know what it felt like to be disrespected and that he doesn't trust me anymore because I repeat everything that happens between us. I talk to my family about it. And because he was sexually frustrated. He said that he didn't realize that once the Baby born we wouldn't have as much time together and that I'm always focused on Greyson and he never has my attention. He kept trying to get mr to stay in the room and have sex as our son was crying in the other room asking for me and his mom asked me to come get him.
I started rocking him again and SO comes out of the bathroom wanting me to put the Baby on the bed with a bottle to sleep and got upset when I told him it wouldn't work. He said I should stop rocking him and make him start falling asleep by himself and called our Son a "spoiled little bitch" because he wanted to watch his videos- 5 little monkeys, wheels on the bus, etc. Before he falls to sleep.
He said he's tired of waiting and needing me all the time and me not wanting him the same way (sexually) and said that sometimes he wishes it was legal when women teased men to a certain extent they could just take them then however they want then said he also doesn't want it legal.
I'm just tired of being treated this way and I know it isn't good for my son to be around this kind of behavior. I tried talking to SO about it the next day and he played it off like it was a joke and never happened. How do I talk to him about this? Any advice?