I had 5 miscarriages before my son. He is my only living child. I had post partum depression with psychosis and attempted to harm my son. But I stopped myself and voluntarily commited myself till I was able to be around him during visits without having those thoughts. Since then me and my husbands seperated and now I'm a single mom taking care of him on my own and working 2 jobs. The ppd is getting worse. And I am currently 9 weeks pregnant so I am unable to take antidepressants due to my high risk pregnancy. I just want a break from my son. I have no family to watch him. And no one to help me. And I cant talk to my ex husband about it because he will try to take custody of our son. So I'm freaking out. What has helped you ladies get past the ppd, i dont have a medical card for counseling either.

Update: Apparently I need to clarify. I've asked for help from my ex previously. His new gf is also pregnant and she refuses to let our son come to their house. He has not seen our son in 3 months. That's why I do not let him take our son now. He wont do it. He uses the threats of taking custody to scare me into not turning him in for child support which he does not pay (he will help with diapers and wipes if I beg for days for help). And has not ever paid. But there is no support there at all. So sending him to his dads is not an option.

Update: For everyone saying to get an abortion. I refuse to entertain that option and even if I did it is now illegal in Kentucky to get an abortion after the heart beat is detectable. The law was passed this month. And I don't have the resources to travel to another state.