Who’s idea is better, mine or his?

Question

Fiancé wants to buy a house the end of this year/or first month or two of 2020. We’re getting married later this year , and going on a Europe trip for our honeymoon for about a week and a half. I booked us a photography session there for pictures. He thinks we should do courthouse wedding with a nice dinner with family, go on our trip, and start house hunting. Then once we have the house, have a big party with catering and I can wear my dress and get pictures. He says the house is our marriage and it doesn’t matter where we get married, as we’ll be married anyway. 
I want to spend some of our savings, around 5-6K on a small wedding, go on our trip, and push off the house a little longer. It’s really important to me to have nice pictures to hang up everywhere. 
Which would you choose?

Answer

I’d get a house. You can always have a nice party to celebrate your wedding but I wouldn’t spend a ton on a “small” 6k wedding when you could put that towards a down payment.

Answer

His idea is much better and more responsible.

Answer

I'd go with his idea.  It sounds better.

Answer

Well they’re both great plans but for me, a 5-6K budget on a wedding isn’t a crazy amount and I feel like if you don’t have the wedding you desire and the photos you will get taken then you have no memories of the actual day to look back on or none to show your children/grandchildren years for now and I feel like I’d regret that. It’s an important milestone in the lives you are investing together and that’s something you want to enjoy, celebrate, create the memory in your head and also something you can look back on... like- look at how young we were 10 years ago or I can’t believe I had my hair like that... the photographers get intimate moments and also other moments such as friends and family celebrating your moving forth in your relationship. Get married, have fun go on your honey moon... the house of your dreams will be there when you get back. Who cares if you wait a little longer to get that. Houses come and go... normally you get married to your husband once and that’s it. You’ll have tons of time to buy a house, you only get to do your wedding once.

Answer

Take really good pictures at the courthouse wedding and hang them up in the house if it matters that much to you. Or just do a regular photo shoot. My friend got married a year before her wedding, which was gorgeous and exactly what she wanted. She had time to save and plan for it. I thought it was a great idea.

Answer

I would definitely go with his idea

Answer

I would try and compromise in the middle. Have a smaller wedding ceremony with friends and family. I think 5-6k is reasonable to spend. But he does have a point and spending a lot on a wedding, plus an international trip, then trying to buy a house is a lot. You’ll have to decide what’s most important to you guys. Make a list of the 3 and label them from 1-3 with 1 being most important and 3 being something y’all could live without doing at the moment.

Answer

I’m going to go with the unpopular vote of do the wedding. I think 5-6k is very reasonable for a wedding. I think you will regret it if you don’t. I think wedding pictures are important and so special. I don’t think your SO is being unreasonable but I think you should voice to him how important a wedding is to you. Some girls dream of their weddings their entire life. You aren’t asking to spend 50% of a down payment of a house on the wedding. What’s important to you matters- don’t let anyone talk you out of what you want. ♥️

Answer

Both ideas are perfectly fine. The problem is that you don’t agree. This is probably one where you both need to compromise. Maybe do a smaller budget wedding but hire a great photographer for those pictures that are important to you. And you fiancé will probably need to accept that doing so may push back his timeline by a few months but if you guys work together to budget extra hard maybe you can make up some of that money more quickly but it will probably require a more concerted effort.

Answer

I agree with him..

Who’s idea is better, mine or his?

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