So a while back I posted on here about the frustrations I had about my 9 year old step daughter not wanting to visit us for the passed year. I asked whether it was wrong to donate her Christmas presents to a children’s hospital if in the even she decided that she did not want to come for Christmas. Well I deleted that post because people were so hateful (they don’t even know the troubles we’ve had with her over the years). Now here’s the update on that: I brought the idea of donating her gifts up to my husband and he thought it was a great idea to give them to children who would appreciate them. Christmas came and went and she did not come visit. We waited for a few weeks and she did not visit. Last week we had given up and decided to donate the gifts. The children were delighted to receive gifts and the smiles on their faces were thanks enough. I feel we made the right decision and we will be doing it again if this next Christmas she decides not to come or have contact (would be going on 2 years no contact)

Edit: we have begged her mother multiple times to get her into counselling with no luck on her side. My husband has no parental rights because his ex really fucked him over with no custody and the max amount for child support and even had the nerve to try for alimony because she didn’t want to work. Daughter tells her brother that she doesn’t want to come because we don’t allow them to play video games since that’s all that they do at their moms house. We’ve heard the excuses like: the music is too loud when my husband is driving, it’s too dark to leave the house, she doesn’t like visiting our family, she doesn’t like the meals that we make (her mom is always buying chicken fingers and pizza to eat, I make sure they get an actual meal), she doesn’t like the clothes that we have (she has picked them out herself when we took her shopping), she doesn’t like our dogs (we have had them for years and they’ve never been a problem). We did not tell her that ‘come visit us or you don’t get your gifts’, in fact we didn’t even mention anything about giving away her gifts. We have shown her nothing but love every single time that she has come before and one day she just didn’t want to come which turned into her not ever wanting to come back. Before posting hateful and judgemental comments please ask for more facts.