So, I really like this boy. We’ve been “friends” since 2016 and every year since then we’ve hooked up. we probably hooked up once/twice every year since 2016 and I’ve liked him before but the feeling always went away. However, recently (in December kkkk) I lost my v card to him :/. Is not like I regret but I feel that it just made me like him more and now I just can’t stop thinking about him. Before that, we agreed that it was a no feelings things ( that I knew I wasn’t going to be able to comply to ), however after it, some weeks after, we texted me saying that he was thinking about having something serious. It annoyed me so I just shut him down. After that we stopped talking, however I just couldn’t handle not talking with him and it just hurt to see with him with other girls, so I decided to text him. I said that we shouldnt continue like that and that I missed him, he said that he missed me too and blah blah blah. The problem is that I can’t think about him as only a friend or fuck budy. I really like him. Really. But I doubt that by now he still feels the same. Idk. Sometimes I catch him looking at me, but when we’re close to each other, is like I just don’t exist. I feel that he just wants sex, but despite that I just can’t let go of him. What should I do ? Should I just give up? I already tried, but it just hurts more than keeping him close.