I’ve asked both of our families not to come to the hospital while I’m in labor. I feel uncomfortable with people sitting outside trying to listen in. My mother in law always tells the story of her birth and says there was a woman screaming in the room next to her like it was an annoyance and she would never have done something like that. Hearing her talk that way makes me upset because every women experiences labor differently and I don’t want to be judged if I yell out or something, so I’ve asked no one to come until we text them and let them know the baby is here and let them know a good time to come. My husband is onboard with this. And it’s fair, both of our families received the same request. I feel like this request will be respected and is taken care of.

Now, post delivery, my mother in law is the one who makes me the most nervous. My family is so easy going. If we had a rough labor and needed to sleep before having visitors, that would totally be respected by my family. My mother in law is going to be chomping at the bit to get in there though. I feel like we could keep her out for a few hours, but that would be it. And my husband has a soft spot for his mom that I think makes it hard for him to see why it bothers me. Like, she’s making it about her, but it has nothing to do with her. This isn’t her first grandchild and I know she’s excited, but sometimes she makes me feel like I’m just a breeder for her family, like all she wants is this grand baby and to see the grand baby and not so much worried about how I might be feeling or what I might need. I love my MIL, she’s very sweet and loving, but she also is just the opposite of me. I’m reserved and private and a little nervous about labor and delivery and she sort of disregards any misgivings I may have and just talks about what a miracle it all is. Lol, she’s sweet, but to someone who will likely go through hell getting this baby out and be laying there with stitches and blood pouring out of them, having someone so bubbly want to visit so soon and probably want to take a million pictures just makes me nervous.

How do you mamas plan on managing visitors? Especially ones that don’t make you feel entirely comfortable? Will you allow them to take pictures? My husband says we have to let his mom take pictures because it would just devastate her if she couldn’t. I’m not against pictures, I just want to recover a little and get cleaned up and maybe take pictures the next day. And I want to be able to share them, not have her do all that before I’ve gotten a nap. I just feel like my husband doesn’t get that his mom is a little overbearing and just too much sometimes. What do you ladies think? How would you handle this? And if you’re not like me, that’s fine. I get some people want everyone in the delivery room and are so excited to introduce baby right away. I’m just not that person and I’m seeking advise from people more like me. Thanks :)