Im 23 and I found out today that I am pregnant. It’s going to be my husbands and my first. I am happy and excited. But at the same time numb and sad. Because it’s another milestone that I can’t share with my mom. I wish so much she was here to be able to. She passed when I was 16 right before my junior year of high school. She missed out on proms. Graduation. College. First job. Finding my career path. Getting engaged and married. Getting our first apartment together. Going to look at our first house that we are trying to buy. And now this. It’s just like there is this hole that I can’t fill because I know when we tell everyone that I still can’t tell her and be able to see her reaction. For her to be there with me. When she passed I recognized she wouldn’t be there for the remainder of high school. But I never once thought about everything else ... 😭

Has anyone else lost a parent who they were close to and wish more than anything were here to experience this with you? Especially for the first time? How do you deal with it?

I know if this baby is a girl, her first name is going to be after my mom. Her middle is a middle name passed on in my husbands family. Amy Lynn. ❤️