I’m not a first time mom. I just had my second baby 17 days ago, my labor was pretty traumatic, my blood pressure was extremely high. In the end as soon as I had my spinal my son went into distress and his heart almost stopped.. I remember being in so much pain because I labored for a good 30+ hours I was in and out of lConsciousness and I remember begging the nurse to save my son. An emergency c section had to be done. Once he was out my blood pressure bottomed out and my husband was very close to losing me, for the next two days I was in and out of it. Conversations were about a minute long because I would just pass right back out. Then I stayed in the hospital for an additional 7 days, everyday I had 5 different doctors changing my medication to try and “lower” my blood pressure.. because they weren’t giving it time to work my blood pressure wouldn’t stabilize. I told the nurse on the last day that I was ready to go home. I would no longer stay for me but I will stay for my son. She threatened me by saying if I left my insurance wouldn’t cover my entire stay, I called her bluff and told her “Oh well, I’ll figure it out”. I was forced to see a kidney and blood pressure specialist before I left and as he’s talking to me he has no clue why he’s even talking to me.. well we were able to go home. Since then I have been taking shifts with my husband taking care of my oldest (5) and my newborn. Well I have noticed that I’m starting to feel a lot more depressed, but I’m so used to it from being unmedicated for so long. But I feel like everything is starting to pile up and I have no idea how to handle it... last night I found a softball sized mass on my belly above my hip. Still having troubles with my c section incision, but med free. But my biggest issue is my husband.. he has such a high sex drive, he hasn’t kept his hands off of me and I have been trying desperately to meet his needs by providing oral sex but it’s not enough, he’s gotten to the point where he is sexually frustrated and he gets aggressive (not physical in anyway just quite mean to me) I dont know what else I can do... I have done research and I know it’s not good to have sex before 6 weeks but I don’t know what else to do..I don’t want to ruin my relationship.. it’s making me incredibly depressed because I’m trying so hard to do it all and I know I cant.

Sorry this post is so long.. I have a ton on my mind and literally working on two hours of sleep.