When I was pregnant I thought I knew how to take care of a baby and that it would come easy to me. I would help take care of my niece when she was born but that was 6 years ago so it’s been awhile. When I had my son all of a sudden I felt like I was doing everything wrong or not good enough. I gave up on breast feeding after only a week of having him and now I wish more then ever that I could go back and try harder. Now we are formula feeding him and I’m scared I’m over feeding him or not feeding him enough. How do I know if he’s really hungry or just has a upset tummy and wants to eat his hands and cry?

I feel like I never know what he wants and it’s always a guessing game. He sleeps most of the day and I just stare at him hoping he’ll wake up and when he wakes up I’m wishing he’d just fall back asleep. What are you meant to do with a 4 week old baby when they’re awake? I feel like most of the time when he’s awake he’s always crying and uncomfortable. He’s a gassy baby he grunts and cries till he gets some of his gas out and it breaks my heart to see him like that. Sometimes I confuse his fussiness with hunger and I’ll feed him again even tho he ate 3oz 30 minutes before and then after I feed him more he’s still fussy till he falls asleep.

We live with my SOs parents till we can find a place we can afford. Every time my LO cries I cringe because I know they’re going to say something like “oh someone’s hungry” “someone’s not happy” “oh he’s crying again” it makes me feel like a bad mother because he’s already been fed and changed and I just don’t know what else he could be crying for so I do my best to comfort him and try to make him stop crying because I don’t want them saying anything else that will make me feel worse.

I’m also nervous to go out of the house and take him places with me. He had a drs appointment this week so I do the normal things I get him ready feed him and change his diaper and think he’ll be ok for a few hrs. Nope! When we get to the drs office he immediately starts crying so I take him out of his car seat and feed him in the waiting room while everyone keeps looking at me and he’s eating like he’s starving even tho he ate 4oz before we got there and it’s only a 15 min drive to the drs office.

Also what do I do when he gets hungry and I’m out shopping? Do I drop everything I’m doing leave my cart and go to the car to feed him? Last time I went to the store with him he was getting fussy even tho it was only 1 1/2 hrs since I fed him last so I took him out of his car seat and fed him standing up off to the side while people were walking around us and I felt so awkward. I couldn’t just wait till we were done shopping to feed him he gets so mad he screams and turns bright red and he usually doesn’t take a pacifier so I can’t use that to soothe him.

Sorry this is so long I guess I was just getting everything off my chest. If anyone has any tips or advise I’d love to know it. Or just comment if you feel the same so I know I’m not the only one who feels this way.