The struggle is real, y’all. I have seen an ultrasound of twins, one boy and one girl, two newborns, both girls, and a gender/baby announcement for a baby boy done by their 2 year old daughter on Facebook.

I hate scrolling through my news feed anymore. Not because these people aren’t good people or I’m unhappy for them, but because I’m unhappy for myself. Two. And. A. Half. Years. that we have been trying. Charting. OV kits, CM monitoring, BB temping, sex even when we don’t feel like it because the want for a baby so great, and the HUNDREDS of dollars on pregnancy tests because I had a craving for something or it’s the day of my period and I haven’t even spotted by lunch.

I’ll be 29 in a little over a month and I’ve pretty much given up hope. I’m overweight due to a long undiagnosed thyroid issue, which I’m now medicated for and am working on the weight issue, but other than that, I’m perfectly healthy, or so it seems.

Y’all just keep me in your prayers because I’m starting to wonder what my purpose in this life even is.