Incomprehensible. I can't even talk about it without crying. I am so ready to be a mother. I feel like I will be terrible because the baby I want more than anything is already gone. I'm scared we won't get pregnant again, or if we do the same this will happen. I want a baby but I have no sex drive. I can't eat, I have no good personality left, I can't sleep and even when I can Instill wake up tired. Pregnancy tests keep coming back positive and I'm hopeless. I am getting a tattoo for my little man in heaven, hopefully that will give me closure. I miss you Nikolas Alexander, more every minute of every day.