If everybody says that you are suppose to know your own body,then why do I keep feeling shamed when I tell people with all honesty and conviction that I very much plan (as much as I actually can before God laughs and mixes things up on me) to have a medicated birth. I have never been pregnant,but have been ttc for little over 2 years now; my friend/coworker has an almost 3 yr old. She apparently has a moderately high pain tolerance and got her epidural at almost the last possible moment that she could,got a spinal,and says that it messed up her back for awhile and things still aren't quite right. I get her fear and now wanting to do it natural. I have NEVER had a broken bone or stitches in my life,and the most pain I felt was when I got my tattoo,and I swear I will never do it again. I'm absolutely terrified of birth bc my cramps are like 100s of butcher knives slicing through my uterus. I want to at least experience one pregnancy and have one bio child between my husband and I (I want more,but I'm also open to adoption for a child that needs me),but I absolutely without a doubt in my mind want whatever medication I can get. Other women have told me so many times that natural is the way to go and my body knows what to do,but what if my body can't handle that type of trauma to it when it has literally never before experienced any kind of trauma. Just because my body knows what to do doesn't mean it isn't scarier than hell to think of the worst pain I will absolutely ever experience and having to experience it for hours. Why do women have to shame other women when someone like me has absolutely no control over how much or how little pain my body feels. If I'm suppose to know my own body,why do people shame me for making the best decision for ME????