So I've been really sensitive all week, very quick to all of my emotions, especially sadness. We lost our cat, my only baby, unexpectedly a little over a month ago and all week anytime I think of her, uncontrollable tears and sobbing. I realized after saying outloud that I have cried about her every day this week so far, that it's because AF is due in two days.... which brought on a whole new level of sadness. We've been ttc for over three years now. I just had my HSG test almost hoping it was my tubes so we would finally have an answer to our unexplained infertility, everything looked perfect like it does with every test we've done. I have heard the HSG can increase fertility for some people and was a little excited by that. But with the realization I'm most likely pmsing, I feel utterly defeated. I'm so tired of waiting and trying and not trying and watching everyone else have a baby but me and missing my baby girl so much it hurts. Whenever I was having a really rough time not being a human mom I would just love on her and think "at least I have you baby girl". But now she's gone and the world just seems like a cruel heartless place. It's been such a rough week... I don't know how I will deal with AF and her bullshit this month.

*update*

My period was supposed to start yesterday, but when I got up to go to the bathroom first thing yesterday morning I had a tiny spot of brown in my discharge. This morning, a tiny spot of brownish pink. I've never had spotting, AF is usually full power, bright red and gushing from day one. Could this be it? Could the HSG test really helped? Am I pregnant? I'm going to wait a few more days until I have completely missed my period and then try to test. I will keep you posted...