Powerful

I just want to share how much tragedy really makes a man grow- and you wouldn't know it until you are faced with similar fears again.

March of 2014 my boyfriend (20 at the time) and I (21 at the time) found out we were expecting, when I told him it wasn't the prettiest of scenes, but I am sure for many young- unexpected pregnancies it is that way. We didn't speak for 3 days, which I understood, and he still kissed me goodnight- which helped me know he just was in shock, deep shock. After a little he understood why I wanted to keep the child, and begin to love it as I did. When we went for our first ultrasound at 10 weeks, the doctor could not find the heart beat and we were struck with tragedy. Miscarriage is something so heartbreaking, that not only we go through as women, but the men who come to accept what is there are broken as well. Here we are quite a bit over a year later and I am throwing up every morning until 4 in the afternoon, I feel my uterus prepare for what is to come, and we are 4 days shy of a potentially missed period. As I know this could be just a fluke with my body, I decided to tell him- not to scare or freak him out- but because I am scared myself. Not scared of being pregnant, but losing another child. And only he really knows my pain. On the way home from bowling last night I asked him if we could go to the store. And yes, he said no- let wait until you so miss your period. But he grabbed my hand and held it so tight and told me everything was going to be okay. He has grown so much, and with it our relationship is much stronger. Deepest prayers please, if not for a healthy pregnancy now.. but for a healthy one later.