Going to have one soon...

So never would I thought I would be having one. I don’t even like saying the word, coming from a religion/family that is against abortions makes it even harder. I’m 21 and I’m in nursing school and my bf and I are still long distance, I’ve always wanted a child but we’re not ready for one right now and I know that doing this is something I should do, we can’t afford a child right now. I’m planning on taking the pill in 2 weeks when I’m at 5 weeks but I’m scared. My biggest fear is that God is giving me this chance to have a child and if I terminate my pregnancy now will this have been the only time? Will I ever get pregnant again? Will this pill cause infertility? Will it cause my future pregnancies to not develop full term? You’d think I’d know the answer to some of these but I don’t, I honestly don’t know if I’m here for answers or to vent, but I’d like to hear from some of your experiences please.