How much bleeding is too much

I've had 3 miscarriages. Yesterday was my missed period. My cycle is ALWAYS on track. Today I just got home from work and went to the bathroom. I'm always terrified of seeing blood, and I just saw a little. I'll post a photo. It's a little tad bit more pink in person. I'm getting that horrible feeling you guys. Why does this have to happen to some of us. Why cant I have a normal pregnancy. Why does my body have to fail me and not do what it's supposed to do. Why cant I do the exciting pregnancy things others get to do. Why cant my body keep a pregnancy. My body can get pregnant easily but never keep it. What's wrong with me. I hate this. So much. Is this just the beginning of the terrible miscarriage I am so used to. Why do I have to be used to this. Why should any of us have this happen so much that we're used to it. Here we go again. I dont want to go again. What did I do to deserve this. I try to be kind and gentle to everyone. I love helping others. I love myself because I feel like my best quality is being a kind and caring person. Why does this happen to people who are good people.