I’ll be 15 weeks pregnant tomorrow and I’m just not feeling excited about this pregnancy. I’ve had hyperemesis since 6 weeks pregnant and was just released from being hospitalized this past weekend. I’ve got better meds now but I still feel nauseous at times. So on top of being sick, I guess being on bed rest for a couple of months must have made me lose a lot of muscle because I can’t walk for very long without feeling tired quickly and my heart pounding.

I’m hopeful about getting over all of that soon but also, I don’t really want to be with the father of my child. I know I made a mistake because he’s a lot younger than me and we moved pretty quickly. I got pregnant 2 months into the relationship. After I found out I was pregnant, he started to kinda of show his true self. Maybe I should have known better because of his age but when I met him, he seemed so much more mature. Now, I don’t want to be near him, I don’t want to talk or text and I don’t really know what to say without breaking his heart because he’s really insecure and clingy. Which is part of the reason I don’t want to be with him.

Most people may think you have to be with the father of your child maybe due to religious reasons, socioeconomic views, or just personal preference. I do not believe this at all. I want to leave him and coparent. It’s just going to be difficult to deal with this during this time in my life. It sounds selfish but of course, as a pregnant woman, I’m going through a lot myself and a break up is the last thing I need right now. I will tell him but I just needed to vent. I don’t really know a lot of people I can talk to.