Am I really a bad person?

Question

LADIES!!!!! I just need some real advice....
I’m anonymous because I am embarrassed. 
Backstory: my ex and I have been broken up since December 2018... we were together since March 2018 and it was just awful, but I’m so forgiving and nice I kept dating him. I finally had enough and dumped him. He said he would change but he never did so two weeks ago I told him we are completely done and never getting back together. 
We broke up because he was literally so mean. Called me every bad name you could think of. We argued everyday all day long. He even called me a bad mom that one hurt the most. He would always say sorry etc etc and that relationships ain’t perfect. 
Nowwwww this is what I need advice on. 
Since being done completely he’s asked to remain friends I agreed because I’m just a nice person ya know. Well it’s been awful he’s all in my business threatening to beat up guys I hang with etc. he refuses to eat and keeps telling me he’s going to kill himself because of me. I think that’s the worst thing someone can do to someone. I keep telling him he’s an adult and I don’t control his actions. I informed his mom over his suicide remarks and she DEFENDS him saying he’ll change and to take him back basically. He was in the hospital the other day because he passed out from not eating. I honestly don’t feel bad because he’s an adult and I shouldn’t be blamed for this I stuck it out way longer than most girls would have. I kept giving him chances he never wanted to change until I said we are NEVER getting back together. He’s making me feel terrible because all I keep thinking about is what if he does it idk what to do. What do I say. I told his mom that we just don’t need to talk because it’s not doing anything positive for him. I’ve tried not talking that didn’t work he showed up at my house. I blocked him from Snapchat so he doesn’t go off on me over what I do. He calls me 24/7 This is toxic I know. But am I being a bad person for just not giving him another chance and taking him back? I’m so confused. I feel awful for not caring has anyone been through this?

Answer

This guy sounds like a psychopath and his mother is an enabler. Change your number and block him on everything. If he shows up at your house, call the police. Nothing he does is on you, like you said, he’s an adult making his own decisions. Don’t let him reel you in! Run away and never look back! 👏

Answer

You need to cut them both off. Change your number and don’t give them it. He’s being manipulative. He’s an adult and needs to act like one.  You being ‘nice’ to him is just fueling him to keep doing and saying those things.

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I would also try to alert the police. Just to have a record in case things go left real quick

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If he makes a threat of harming himself again, Call the police to do a “wellness check” and leave it in their hands. 
The police can take him to the hospital after they evaluate his safety. 
If you do this, you don’t have to contact him but you’re also making sure he’s safe. 
I’m sorry this is happening. I agree with you, your presence isn’t helping him even if he can’t see that.

Answer

Yes, I have been through something similar. My own parents defended him.
Unfortunately, you cannot get out of this being nice, you need to stop talking to him. His behavior is emotionally abusive & that's not a healthy friendship. It is toxic & you might miss him, but you need to cut all contact, I recommend for at least 3 months. 
You need to set healthy boundaries with people, he is trying to keep you from doing that.
My ex lost 40 lbs & he was never fat, complained of being unable to eat, started drinking and telling me about this- painting it as destructive behavior, but he's not a real alcoholic- I've known alcoholics- living in his car blaming it on being unable to be in his room i used to stay in with him, and saying he wanted to kill himself, he also contacted my parents & showed up to my house crying to them & my dad told me to call him.
Anyway, yes, I'd feel awful if someone killed themselves & I'd like to prevent it, but I was being manipulated. :/
This guy did horrible things to me and he'd never be happy with my support... so I had to prioritize myself, and it was better for both people not to talk, because talking to me allowed him to think he had some kind of chance no matter how many times I told him that's not the case.
Seriously, you have to go no contact.

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Ugh he sounds fucking terrible. 
Literally, if a girl was doing this to a guy... She'd be deemed fucking psychotic.. but a guy does it to a girl and we have to question if we are a good person or not... Fuck that guy. Cut him the fuck out of your life. No one has time for that added stress and drama. He needs to spend a few days in the ward on suicide watch so he can get some professional help.

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Don't take him back. You are a strong person for resisting his selfish attempts to manipulate you. Don't give in to him. Just cut him out of your life completely. You don't need people in your life like that.

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No just cut him out of your life completely and move on with your life

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I'm currently going through this and to make it worse my mom still talks to the fool. I had to change my number three times, and move away cause he wouldn't stop showing up and harassing me in person/by phone. Cut him out completely.