Ima make this as short as possible

My name is Shay and my wife name is Nicole

We were together for 5 years and we had some sexual encounters with someone and My wife became very sexually interested in this woman after a year we stopped the encounter because during the acts favoritism was shown and My wife was only interested in having sex with the other girl

I felt invisible to my wife I couldn't get her to pay attention to me

She doesn't count that as cheating but I do because she was only interested in having sex with this girl and by me being there it made it ok.

After we stopped she was still very interested in this girl I never developed feelings for the girl I just joined into the acts because for years my wife begged me for a 3sum n I keep saying no but I finally agreed

I was still very in loved with my wife I proposed to her in 2015 and in 2016 my mom died and I didn't wanna lose anyone else so I wanted to hold onto her we set a date n went shopping for dresses even though the other girl was still in her head

My birthday is Oct 13 hers Oct 14

So our date was Oct 27

On Oct 1 she told me bby I'm sorry but I dont wanna get married right now she told me I deserved someone better I was so heartbroken I felt like I was losing someone else very special to me

I was so hurt n broken I gave her an ultimatum by saying if we dont get married we through

So we separated while separated I seen the girl again and I tried my best to fight the temptations but she didn't make it any easier and I had so many emotions that I ended up having sex with her

I told my wife the same day

We ended getting married a month later I know I'm wrong for having sex with the girl but I'm not the only person in the wrong my wife keeps telling me what she did wasn't wrong and it's not considered cheating and physical cheating is worse then mental

We been married for 3 years but can't seem to keep past anything we been separated for 2 years n now I have a gf of 2 months and she always makes me feel bad about the past n my current gf and I'm tired.

We still stay together while separated I had our first child now our baby is 7 months old

Its been 8 years of us being together

3 married

2 separated