Im 30yrs old will be married for 6years this month I've been with husband since 2006 we married in 2014 when i was pregnant with our 3rd child countless times he had said to me during arguments i forced him to marry me n i never said anything but this well there's the door leave .... he didn't

In 2014 i found out about an affair he had an December that year there was a girl who constantly called him and he would reject the call cause i was with him in the car mean while i was grieving 2015 March marked a bad year for my family my baby sister was raped n murdered during this time i found it so hard to cope with a husband who lied and always said that i am crazy when i raised questions about his shit in 2016 january i quit my job to support my family at court cause the trail for baby sis started ....

What a coincidence i go throughy phone which was his before his email account was on it happened to be his on a freaking Dating site i was so disgusted there were no words i just felt like my world broke n i lost interest in him

I quickly moved on to getting a job he made life crap he didn't support me so i started working left to better job then i became the one who started doing the wrong things chatting to guys n i only grew close to one but during my divorce and my whole family practically didn't support me they forced me to work things out i cancelled the divorce i was still unhappy at the end so even i was unhappy i tried had MISCARRIAGE and it broke me because he didnt believe that I was pregnant and i then lost more of myself n lost total interest in him i then i applied fora divorce again n he went physco turned all my family against me and idk why but i went back n now its 2019 in a toxic marriage draining me we both made mistakes i forgave him he didnt forgive me he constantly checks my phone hacks and constantly wants me at home i cant chat to no one not even my family and he isolates me from them idk what to do pregnant now im 16 weeks n somehow i cant do this anymore it hurts to much