So, my period started today, and it’s fairly heavy, which requires me to make frequent bathroom stops. I just went and took care of business, and went about my day. About five minutes later, I have this uncomfortable itching sensation in my crotch. Awkward! I try to subtly scratch, but it’s not effective, and it’s itchy. I go back in the bathroom to adjust things, and see a big ant crawling in my undies. Needless to say, I scream, whip off my jeans and underwear, and start dancing around and stomping on them like nobody’s business.

Thank goodness I work from home, because that would be weird to explain.