Hey ladies,

SHORT BACKSTORY;

My man and I have been together for 7 months already. I love him deeply. I’m 19, he is 25. I love him truly. I have never loved anyone before. He is also my first man so besides soul connection we also shared this beautiful experience of him being my first man in everything (make love).

We also have this weird story of how I fell in love with him 6 months before actually meeting him. I saw him on a post of my friend and I mean I saw many men on social media but he just grabbed my attention. I downloaded that cute video to my phone and also found him online.

I never had the courage to write to him but i used to watch his page and just tell myself of how gorgeous this man is ! I never had that before ! It might sound creepy but it was just a butterfly interesting period. Then I moved to another city and BAM he was at the same gym as me ! Omg I remember that moment. He is so much handsome in life. He noticed me and started talking to me and we just had that connection immediately. Then he asked me on a date, it was SO romantic !

And in one week he asked me to be his girlfriend and we have been super happy ever after.

THE ISSUE :

So some of you will probably say to leave him since I saw many other posts of girls asking for help and everyone just said “dump his ass” I’m not planning on leaving him. It’s not that easy and I’m not like that in a relationship. I’m looking for a genuine opinion and a true advice without judgments.

Since the beginning of our relationship he slowly started to “check” me. Basically talking to me normally during nights and not being normal during days. After whole week being confused what have I done he said he was “checking” me and that it was a test and I passed.

He has a lot of trust issues towards people since childhood so I let that one slide...

well who am I lying to ? I let it slide every time.

Then everything goes perfect ! We go through our blessings and issues greatly without anything out of normal until one day I came over his place and while he was playing a guitar I looked at his book shelf he has plenty of books and I was just reading the names of his literature he was smiling and then BAM he started being so serious and said “You did a very bad thing you know ? You looked at my shelf without permission that means you are a very curious person. Leave”

I started being very sad and left in almost tears. He then ran behind me and smiled and hugged me and said “Hey, it’s ok. I understand why you did that. It was just a lesson for you I wanted to learn. I can break up with you and in two seconds tell you it’s a lesson!” (This was 1 month into our relationship)

Everything was perfect until... (BTW IM NOT TELLING ALL SITUATIONS BECAUSE I CANT REMEMBER THEM BUT EVERY MONTH OF 7 MONTHS INTO OUR RELATIONSHIP ONCE A MONTH THIS THING HAPPENS, just so you understand)

Once in a month every month he would push me away by saying “I don’t need it”, “I don’t need you”, “I’m always by my own”, “nobody needs love” and all other hurtful horrible things that come out of his mouth during this one particular time when he is very emotionally down.

He would do that very often, if I tell him one story I had in my life and later next day tell him the same story and ONE detail changes like the color or the time he pushes me away and says I’m a liar and he can’t trust me and then hurts me and I’m in tears because he tells me to never call him that he dumps me. After that in 10 minutes he calls back and says it’s a lesson and he adores me.

THE WORST ONE was 5 months into our relationship. He competed very badly at his competition and started being very upset. All this time I supported him, been there for him all the time. So he breaks up with me, of course I cry a lot because I trust him all the time but I still hope that he will call in couple of minutes and says that it’s a lesson. But he didn’t... at the same time he doesn’t let me leave. He would make me cry, hurt me with words and then when I tell him “I have to go and I don’t want to talk to you” he calls me million of times and doesn’t let me go. Makes me cry even more. So hours pass I’m very devastated I don’t know what I have done... until he says to bring me his stuff from my apartment outside and I realize that this is over FOR REAL 110% ... I couldn’t believe it !

I come out horribly looking from all the sobbing. My face super puffy... he looks at me and starts wiping my tears, I tell him not to touch me since it hurts. Then he hugs me and whispers “IM SO SO SO SORRY ... I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU... It was a test for me... I can’t....” and it sounded so honest I have never felt it that way before!

Then after when everything was great he said “now you don’t have to ever worry” and I was like “ohhh thank God !!!!” But that wasn’t true...

Time goes by I meet his family, they fall in love with me ! Everything feels so great and real that we are serious ! He takes me to the store to measure my finger for maybe a proposal. He talks about having kids with me and that he has never wanted them with anyone !

Everything is perfect ! For a whole month and I’m just like Omg yes we are past this phase of “tests” until YESTERDAY ....

he did the same thing... he told me he doesn’t need me and all that crap from nothing!!!!

Made me sob again... then said it was fine and it was just a lesson for me to learn in millionth time. Told me I have to change and “turn my head on” and start thinking.

Now it’s going fine from yesterday.

Again, these are not all the incidents. We had way them more but we also have amazing and perfect time. I just don’t understand why...

And today I posted a story to my IG just of

My face after training and he sent me a message “What kind of story is that...?”

And I asked him “Huh? It’s just my face”

He said “Well the fact that you put a funny effect of hearts makes you look like you’re 13”

And laughed.

Thanks for reading. Sorry for it being so long. Had to get it out and ask for advice.