There’s this chick my older brother used to date when we were in high school; honestly a bit of a obsessive bitch. But my issues with her was while she was with my brother she expressed to me about wanting to get with my boyfriend (now husband), got his number off my brother’s phone, and constantly tried texting him even when he’d block her or tell her to stop (kept downloading texting apps). Well recently she added us both on instagram and I thought maybe she changed since it’s been 6-7 years since all that. Well right away she messaged my husband and I expressed to him that I really don’t want him talking with her, he said he wouldn’t. Well I went on his instagram to take a picture of our conversation earlier (he said something cute and I wanted to save it but accidentally deleted our conversation off mine) and I saw they were message, it was just harmless catching up. But am I overreacting by being upset and feeling disrespected because I told him I wasn’t okay with them talking because I honestly don’t trust her fully and find it suspicious that she decided to message him but not me

Editing to add: I have told him about it and he doesn’t see the issue because it was just friendly catching up conversation. I told him while yes it was harmless and I’m not accusing him of trying to cheat, but what my issue about it is that I already told him I don’t feel comfortable with him talking to her as she’s shown her ass multiple times to us in the past and yes we’re older now and possibly all changed but I still don’t feel comfortable with her as a person because of our past history. Maybe it would be different if she would’ve messaged me first as she’s been on my Instagram for a week longer than my husband’s but that just wasn’t the case. Yes it’s on him to keep those boundaries which is what I’m having an issue with, I’m not taking it up with her because it’s his responsibility to respect me and my feelings. Though I do wish she’d respect me as we were good friends at one point in time.