I’ve struggled with OCD and anxiety my whole life. I went to a treatment place and it started to get better. but i feel worse than when i started now. i’m not more anxious, i’m depressed, and it’s 1000 times worse. I have no motivation to do anything, and even though my family and doctors know i’m depressed, they tell me to snap out of it. I try to tell them what i’m feeling but they only seem to care about me going to school for some reason. My parents get hysterical every morning when i refuse to go to school. But it’s not like i can just get up and do it. I feel like i’m being taken for granted? I feel like depression is so much more than sadness. I’m not even living life anymore. i wake up every day and just wait until i get to fall asleep again. I don’t want to live like this but i don’t have the motivation to work on it anymore. I feel like my family is disappointed in me. my best isn’t good enough for anybody, hell my best isn’t good enough for myself. i get it. it’s not that i’m sad, i am just numb to all emotions. i’m not sad, i just don’t want to live anymore.

p.s. i am completely safe with myself, i have no plan to harm myself, and if i did, i would tell someone. I’m not ready to give up just yet.