to think about how similar my boyfriend is to a serial killer/psycho makes me sick to my stomach and scared. i’ve watched all of these documentaries and it just freaks me out because my boyfriend just has so many qualities of sick people like the man in “Abducted in Plain Sight”, Ted Bundy, and many more. I feel like throwing up right now.

let me further explain..

He is so manipulative it is insane. He can manipulate me or anyone into believing or doing anything. He is so rough with me too and will throw me around. he will tell me about these visions he had and how he is “so sick in the head”. he recently told me that he was fantasizing about drilling a hole in someone’s body in a non fatal area while they’re alive and pouring liquid metal in their body and yanking it out when it hardens. he rapes me and smiles as he does it. he hits me and “plays” rough and smiles as he does it. he’s hit me, left bruises, and asked me to cover them up and told me what story to tell. he’s choked me till i went unconscious but in a “playful” way. but he loves me. i don’t know. i feel like i’ve gone absolutely crazy. there’s way more to it but it’s just so much to type and remember. and i understand that leaving is an option but he makes it so. hard. i do love him but i’m so weak.