I’ve been fortunate enough not to have a boyfriend who’d force me to do things I wasn’t comfortable with physically or a boyfriend who’d break up with me because he wasn’t getting some.

I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years and we haven’t taken our relationship to that level yet. It’s partly due to my desire to wait and my belief that you don’t need sex to have love. It’s also partly due to my fear of what will happen after the fact. I don’t know for sure what will happen to our relationship if we start having sex or if that one time will be our last time. It’ll be both our first times and I’ve never thought about giving it away to anyone until him.

I know having sex will be inevitable because I do want to have kids one day, at least try it the natural way first and not the Jane the Virgin way lol

I know he wants to, but I know he would never pressure me into anything or take advantage of me when I’m “excited” 😂😂. I am madly in love with him still and sometimes words cannot express how crazy I am for him. Sometimes my body just starts feeling some kind of way😂😂. Sometimes we’d get to that certain point and he’ll ask, but I’d just wouldn’t know for sure if its what I want, I’d freeze up. In my mind I feel like it’s such a deal breaker, but he’s okay with it. We’d stop and he’d just pull me close and tell me he loves me. I just don’t know how I got so lucky.