So, my gf (37 years old) and me (22 years old) have been together for 2 years, and since the very beginning of our relationship we’ve lived with other people. I first met her when came home during the summer from school and at the time I lived with my dad and basically followed him wherever he stayed at. Well my dad was dating my gf’s older step-sister at the time and was staying at her apartment with her three daughters and my soon-to-be gf. After being there a few weeks me and my gf starting talking and after a drunk night we’ve been together ever since (my dad and gf’s step-sister didn’t make it but we all knew that was gonna happen). Well, since then we’ve been stuck with the same people. After my dad and my gf’s sister broke up, I stayed at the apartments for maybe a month with just my gf, her step-sister and her step-sisters daughters, along with the oldest daughter’s bf and all his friends (it was a pretty crowded apartment). Eventually me and the oldest daughter got into it so I left to live with my dad and my brother (like I’m used to) and my gf followed. Eventually my dad moved again and my gfs sister moved to a double wide trailer and my gf decided to split the bills with her sister so we move in there (again w/everyone). After a month, my gf and me had a falling out and we split up for like a month and I moved back in with my dad and brother at the new place and helped my dad with the bills. After a month that my gf and I got back together, I started staying with her again. Eventually her step sister kicked her two oldest teenage daughters out so her legal husband and his baby mama and their baby (a messed up situation that’s a story of its own) could live with her. After that weird three way relationship between them started getting rocky and my gf’s sister started to go downhill, me and my gf dipped to her best friends house. We stayed there for like a week until I finally convinced her to come stay my dads with me since that was my house, too. So, we started staying with my dad and brother, again. A month later, my dad lets my gf’s niece (her step-sisters oldest daughter) stay at our house and she’s never left. Then after my brother leaves for basic training in the Navy, my dad tells me he’s getting a camper to live in and to put on my grandparents property so me and my gf needed to figure out what we were doing. So we decide that we’re just gonna take over the lease and continue to rent the house we’re at.

Well these leads to current problems. I asked my gf if her step-sisters oldest daughter could find somewhere else to live bc I was tired of her being here. The girl doesn’t clean up, has an attitude problem, and would constantly steal my stuff to the point that I had to buy a new doorknob with a lock for my door to keep her out of my room. I was tired of dealing with it and my dad wouldn’t do anything about it so I wanted to when I took over the lease. Also, I felt like we were at the point of our relationship where we needed live on our own instead of with other people. My gf said no bc she wouldn’t have nowhere to go. So I said okay but in return I didn’t want no one smoking in the house so I could get nice furniture. The day after getting in an argument over where her niece would stay, my dad (who was moving out that weekend) invited my gf’s sister and her youngest daughter to stay at the house bc my gf sister had gotten into with her husband. I thought it was for just one night, but when I got home my gf’s sister was talking about going to her trailer and getting her stuff. This led to more arguments with my gf bc she said couldn’t just tell her sister that she couldn’t stay with her. So now her sister and the youngest one lives with us, again. And then a month later, the middle child decides to move in from her gmas so it’s the whole crowd again. Plus, my gf’s deadbeat brother who doesn’t work and stays on some kind of drug is now here bc he always finds a way to guilt trip my gf into taking care of him. Also, for a short period of time, my gf’s step sister was just going to take her youngest daughter (leave the oldest two with us) and run off to GA with her husband who was now on the run from the cops for violating his probation (the plan failed bc he was caught). So now we have three kids and two jobless adults living with us. The house is always a mess, they keep trying to bring underage people to drink and smoke (after we’ve clearly stated that there was to be none of that happening), the power and water bill is always high, and I’ve been stuck going back and forth into town for kids that aren’t even mine.

My gf says I’m selfish bc I don’t want them here and they’re stressing me out. But I don’t see how it’s wrong for me to be ready to start my life with my SO. I wanted to live with just her bc every one of arguments is rooted in other people that stay with us and we financially can’t afford to take care of these people. I’m tired of always living with other people and it’s getting to the point to where I sometimes want to end my relationship bc I can’t handle all of the people with her. Now she says they’re all a packaged deal but that’s not how it was in the beginning. She’s the one who said that after being together for a year we could get our own place and start a future together. I also wanted to talk about having kids but we definitely don’t have the funds or space for any now. Now it feels like that future is halted bc these people just won’t go away and I’m close to just giving up.