I don’t understand my emotions

I just had my baby less than 2 weeks ago and I’m a single mom. the father isn’t involved for safety reasons, so my daughter will never have any full blood siblings but I still want her to have at least 1 sibling and I’ve always wanted my kids close together like 2 years (like me and my brother) well I’m single so probably won’t happen but I got asked while making my 6 week postpartum appointment if I wanted to get the iud and I said no I’m scared of committing 5 years to a birth control and not be able to have it removed before the 5 years are up and not being able to have my kids close in age I wanna cry but I don’t have any one to talk to cuz I sound crazy