May 16th i went to the dr to see my sweet baby on sonogram and found out i had no amniotic fluid and the baby had no heart beat i was put into labor may 17th i was told for my safety and for the chance to have another baby i should have my 4th c-section i have been living in hell since then i came home yesterday im in a daze i don't want to take off my hospital bands i wrapped a bear in my daughter's clothes that she had on in the hospital and have been sleeping with the bear and holding it i feel like im in the worst nightmare ever and i just cant seem to wake up my little girl would have been born june 20th by c-section i want to start trying for my 5th child in 7 months because i know that i need to hold a baby in my arms again