Sexual abuse

All day today I’ve been posting in different groups because that’s how bad today has been. I’ve been sexually abused more times than I can count day after day. For years. By family members. I didn’t know what it was until I was in middle school. I’m currently 14. The flashbacks are the worse. I come by a guy I flinch. Guys at my school are touchy feely so they touch u when they want to. It scares me because I don’t want to end up in that situation again. It’s so bad I tried committing suicide many times. I don’t succeed but I try. I want to just let go. I feel so depressed that I don’t eat. It’s even interfering with my dating life. Some in my family say they don’t believe me but I can’t convince them all. It hurts because I feel like my voice don’t matter.😭😭😭why can’t I die this is so depressing. I can’t do this anymore plz help. I’m begging no one in my family understands me. I’m all alone.😓😭🥺