Resentment towards husband

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I will be 39 w tomorrow and so far this pregnancy has been easier than my first. The only problem is my husband. We have a toddler who doesn’t nap anymore and we are at full speed from 7 am- 9 pm all day. We have quiet time but that never lasts long. I will be staying home when the baby is born but I am almost resenting it. I’ve always wanted things to be 50-50. Work and parent responsibilities. My husband works 40 hr a week 1:30-10 PLUS he stays up every night (now it’s been for 1.5 years) until 4-7 in the morning trying to work on an online business. He’s spent over 40,000 $ now and he’s made zero income. I’m so OVER IT. He sleeps until 11:30, wakes up, eats whatever I cook, and then goes to work. On his days off he spends most of the time on the computer. I check the bank account every day and more and more money goes out for some kind of business expense. I TRY to be supportive because it’s his dream but we are in debt and he keeps adding more and more. I have my bachelors degree but couldn’t find a job that pays enough to have my 1st child in daycare. I worked part time and watched kids. We decided to have another baby now since I’m already pretty much home most of the time. I take care of our daughter 100% and do all the cleaning cooking shopping. He doesn’t make a lot of money at his full time job so we don’t have a lot of money. I just don’t get what he is thinking. He asked if I could help with the online business since I am home but I don’t have any time if I have to do everything myself. I’ve even mentioned if I can work some but he doesn’t want to have to take care of our kids by himself because it makes him nervous. It makes me so mad. I have to sacrifice everything.

I’m just sooooo resentful and so upset. I’ve told him so many times how I feel and how it upsets me but nothing changes. So I really don’t know what to do. Maybe I’m ungrateful. Maybe I’m just super pregnant and am tired.

He is off work today and I asked him yesterday if we can have a family day. And he stayed up until 5 and is still sleeping. I just tried to wake him up and he got mad. I am so over this shit. Everyday is the same thing. It’s 11 am now and I’ve been up with my daughter since 7. I feel so alone

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