So my husband and I have been having some issues. Some kinda started before I found out about this pregnancy but I tried to overlook what I saw coming and thought that they would resolve as this pregnancy progressed. Anyhow a lot of the main problem has to do with him not helping out with our almost 2 year old, and apparently I don’t make enough money for having a bachelors degree even though my job options have been extremely limited since having our son because I’m the one who has been held solely responsible for pickup and drop off at daycare, and even though I practically cater to his every need at home that still isn’t enough. Along with some intimacy issues and health issues that he practically refuses to take care of. He literally goes to work and comes home and sits on the couch to whatcha tv and play video games every single day. And then on the weekends when he’s off he never wants to do anything or get anything else done with our home renovations that have been torn apart for 3 years now.

So yesterday he called me and started telling me he was talking to someone about refinancing the house and taking more out to finish the projects we need to. Ok sounds like a good idea, we’ve only been there a few years and have a lot of equity cause we got it for next to nothing. However when we started discussing it last night, he basically came out with his plan that he was gonna use the extra on the new mortgage to pay off his credit cards and tractor to free up his credit so that he could go and trade his truck in on a newer model. (Basically all I heard was our mortgage would go up $200 a month and and his truck payment would go up about $200 a month, all for only lowering our monthly expenses by $300 by what he planned on paying off). We barely make enough to pay what we have now and his income varies from week to week and month to month and I’ll be starting a new job in July taking on the insurance, but not making that much more money than I am now. (At least not right away. I will have opportunities in the next 3 years or so to make a significant amount more, but nothing is for certain and I don’t want to 100% count on that because you just never know). Not to mention I’m about to go on leave with no pay for 6 weeks! I’m just so so aggravated with it all and this feels like the straw that broke the camels back. I just don’t understand why he can’t be more responsible especially with 2 children in the picture now! I’m so fucking over it and really don’t know if my marriage will last much longer. I’m just so upset and feel so broken and alone because this is NOT how I ever imagined or wanted my life to be. And I never thought when I married him that he would be like this. I just feel like he’s being selfish because in his plan I would trade my suv in on a cheap little car that I would have to stuff 2 little kids in just to have a cheaper payment there. So I literally would get NOTHING out of this and would still have to listen to him bitch about how I don’t make enough money and he’s tired of working so many hours all the time to never have money to buy extra things when he wants something .