DONT LAUGH AT ME- my husband is military and recently came back from a long deployment.

We don’t have any kids- so me and the cat got pretty close while he was gone.........

He sits on my lap. Every. Time. I poop.

It’s become a ritual that every time I discretely try to use the restroom, the cat will run at full speed and dart into the room before the door shuts. If I manage to shut it before he comes in, he wails outside like he’s being murdered. It’s so obvious from his projectile leap across the living room (and audible purrs from the bathroom) that my husband KNOWS what I’m doing.

What does he know. It’s our bonding time.