Who’s needs should be dealt with first?

Question

I’m really struggling with taking care of my newborn and toddler. Especially mornings... I don’t know if I should feed my newborn (I breastfeed) or show attention to my toddler first. They both need me and I’m only one person I feel like I’m not being a good mom to either.

Answer

You posting this and being concerned shows youre a good mom. We all have days where we feel like a bad mom. You will get into a routine soon, it will be okay. Turn on some Super Simple Songs on YouTube, feed your newborn and sing with your toddler. You got this!

Answer

I don’t wanna vote but maybe give u some suggestions.... as ur feeding the newborn maybe play a small game with ur toddler(if he or she talks maybe play ispy or word repeat) or have them help with baby by getting a diaper for u or a blanket! U could also try to have toddler show u sone dance moves if they like music put some on. It is hard to deal with this but that does not mean ur a bad mommy ur a great mommy for thinking about both ur babies!!! My kids r 20 months apart my oldest always helped me with the baby even tho she wasn’t even two yet.

Answer

I have a 16 month and 8 week old. I know your concern. I always put feedings first. If my toddler is awake while I’m feeding I bring him up on my bed with us. Sometimes I feed the baby in my toddlers room while he plays with toys. I struggled a lot for a the first few weeks about not being able to give my toddler enough love. It went from all about him to barely about him in a day. We both had to adjust. When they both need something I weigh out which need is greater or which one is quicker to take care of. It does get better but it’s ok to feel guilty while adjusting. And it’s ok to shed some tears over that guilt. Been there and done that!

Answer

Try turning on a show for your toddler and sitting and watching with them while you feed the newborn. That way you are spending time with both of them! If you can’t, or just don’t feel comfortable breastfeeding around your toddler, turn something on and make them a healthy snack and go to another room to feed! That’s what my mom used to do when I was little! Apples, French toast sticks, grapes are all good snacks!

Answer

I have a 2 year old and a toddler. You can wake up before your toddler does and nurse baby or you can try and hold baby off for 10-15 mins while you take care of your toddler. What I do is wake up earlier and on the days that I don’t I take them both downstairs and I place baby in the swing and get my toddler breakfast and put his fav show on and I nurse baby. After I’m done then I put baby back down and play with my son.

Answer

I would read a book to my toddler while I fed the baby. You're doing fine! It takes time to figure out what works for your family.

Answer

Feeding is a little more important than attention. I would personally feed first. Then go for the attention. But I think it's really good that you're asking about it

Answer

I have a 2 year old and an almost one month old so I definitely understand where you’re coming from, I definitely struggle with mornings and am still trying to get a routine down. So far I’ve been getting up, making my newborns bottle then making my 2 year olds breakfast, bringing both to our living room and I’ll usually turn some type of cartoon or movie on for my 2 year old just so I can feed my newborn and get him changed and what not most of the time my toddler is too busy eating breakfast and dragging out toys to even notice anything 😂

Answer

Don’t forget to breathe... and find a minute for yourself too lol brush your teeth, eat some breakfast.... you got this

Answer

I'm going to be going through this in a few months and I've been thinking about what we will do too. I'd like to pump again like with my 3rd. I'm not sure how all of this will go when #4 is here 😁. We have diapers and stuff upstairs already and I'll set up my pumping station again and I might add a snack basket for the big guy. Then we can all have something at the same time. My older two are 14 and 12, so they can help some but I honestly don't remember how it was with them... I think I just muddled through and we all came out the other side 🙊😁 I do remember feeding baby while making breakfast or lunch a lot of the time and generally always being on the floor lol but they were both fine and everything was good most of the time. I vaguely remember all of us crying at the same time and just laughing when my SO got home... He was like are you guys gonna be ok? It'll be ok momma, you can do it!

Who’s needs should be dealt with first?

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