I recently got into a relationship and it’s one month today. The unfortunate thing is that we have only seen each other once since we got together. We were hanging out a lot at college and were quite close and snuggly and eventually decided to go out together. This is only me second relationship ever and it’s not really looking like a relationship at the moment.

For the record I am 19 almost 20 and he is 20. We are about 8 or 9 months apart.

He doesn’t have a DL and I do but my mom will not let me drive even though I have my DL. I have not yet told my mom that I am dating him because I am afraid of how she will react. When I asked her if I could visit him and hang out in the local park for a few hours about a week ago. She got really angry with me for asking and inconveniencing her and stated that hanging out was code for trouble. Then she proceeded to lecture me for the next 5 hours about being inconsiderate of her and being selfish and how I do not know this person well enough to hang out with him and I will likely end up in trouble because he could be any body. She went on to say that she finds him creepy (she told me he was cute and sweet when she first met him as my friend) and that he was “trying to lure (me) out” of my house and away from my responsibilities and that he was inconsiderate and selfish to try to make her drive me. She also insisted that there would be absolutely nothing for us to do except get in trouble in the place we would be and accused me of “hiding something” from her and said that I needed to “get new friends”. He is literally part of a new friend group that I made after she said this about my other group of friends. Finally she said as she always does, “if they really cared about you, they would come and visit you, not lure you out away from your family, he can come here“ Obviously however, he’s not invited to her house where I live. She thinks I am hiding things from her and she isn’t wrong but I am afraid she will punish me if I am dating and not allow me to return to college or leave the house.

I am torn between “mother knows best” and I am old enough to date who I want. PS. I never have any trouble with my mom unless I want to visit someone.