I’m frustrated. We started trying this month. I can’t imagine what all you women out there that have been trying for years go through. Because even just one month, breaks my heart. I’m very fortunate to have my daughter at least.

But I. Am. Frustrated.

I had my daughter 7 months ago. When I started my period when she was 2 months old, the rest that followed were all 32 days apart except one which was the second cycle and only off by a day. So I decided to start trying for my second this month, because I’d rather my first two close together and I have such a high risk of cancer in my family and want at least two before my risk goes up any further.

I tested 10 days DPO. I tested 11 days. I tested 2 days late. (Today) all negative. Then I did blood work. <.05 IU/mL. It’s supposed to be 5 or more.

Ugh. The disappointment. Instantly wanted to cry. I’m going on day 35 tomorrow.

Before I was pregnant, my cycle was anywhere from 29-39 days apart. My daughter was clearly the luckiest shot I ever made. She was not planned. I had been misdiagnosed as a teen with PCOS. So she was one of my biggest surprises.

My frustration is 100% on my body. Not necessarily not conceiving within the first month. Of COURSE my body would decide to ovulate or rather not ovulate the FIRST month we would start trying. Really bro!?!

So in conclusion of my complaining and whining, I’m going to focus this week on encouraging other mommas. I’m taking a phlebotomy class and the best way for me to help my own anxiety and negative emotions is by supporting and encouraging others. My goal today is 3 mommas. Maybe I’ll do 3 every day. I’ll work it out I suppose.