I wake up in a hospital room. My hand is being held. I turn my head and stare in disbelief at who’s holding it.

“ Mom?” I quiver. She looks up at me. Tears stain both cheeks.

“ Oh baby!” She cries. “ I’m so glad you’re awake!” She collapses onto me and holds me.

“ What are you doing here?” I ask.

“ Your dad called me. I got on the first flight.” She says, shaky.

“ Where is dad?” I ask, being reminded of him.

“ He’s in the lobby.” She replies. I nod my head and look out the window. I think of the conversations I had in the “ waiting room”. I thought I knew who I wanted. Who I loved. Now I’m confused all over again. I turn back to my mom and grab her in a hug.

“ Oh, mom. I don’t know what to do.” I cry. “ I need you.”

“ I’m here baby. I’m here. What’s wrong?”

“ There’s these boys. Jaime and Carter. They both love me. And I love both of them. Carter is so sweet, understanding, and caring. He’s been there for me for what Jaime put me through and I love him so much. Jaime is sweet, caring, understanding, and he-he’s my first love. I lost my virginity to him. I would’ve had his baby, had we not lost it, but, he uh, kind of,” I sigh. “sexually assaulted me.” Her eyes widen as she looks up at me.

“ Why is he even an option then, Shay. Your father raised you better than that. I know he did.”

“ I know mom, I know. It’s just, he was my first love. You don’t ever let go of them. I cried for months over him mom. I loved him. I still do. He only...did that because he needed me to feel something for him. Even if it was hate.” I explain. She sighs.

“ Shay, I haven’t seen you grow up into this beautiful, strong, girl you are now and I’m so sorry for that. But, I know that you know what you need and want out of a relationship. Who’s gonna give you that?”

“ You sound like dad.” I laugh. She chuckles.

“ Well, we’re both right.”

“ I just don’t know what to do mom. I don’t want to keep them guessing and wondering. That’s not fair, but, I don’t know who I want. I love them both, so much. And I want them both. I don’t know how to choose.”

“ Shay, you may love both of them, but only one is romantically.”

“ What do you mean?” I ask.

“ I know you Shay. You love both of them sure, but not both romantically.” She says. I give her the stink eye.

“ You don’t know a damn thing about me. You left when I was eight! You left when I needed you the most! You left because you couldn’t handle the worse part of “ for better or for worse”. So don’t you dare say you know me because you don’t.”

“ Shay I-I didn’t mean—.”

“ Get out.” I say, turning away.

“ Shay.” She pleads. I turn back to her.

“ I said. Get. Out.” I enunciate. She sighs and gets out of the chair. She heads for the door and turns around.

“ You only love one. Who is it, Shay?” She says and leaves.

“ Thanks for nothing, mommy.” I say to myself in disgust. I go back over everything in my head. Everything Carter’s said and done. Everything Jaime’s said and done. What my dad said. What my mom said. What dream Carter said. What dream Jaime said. I close my eyes and eat my head against the pillow. I inhale. I hash, hash, and rehash over everything. I’m weak and it makes me weaker.

“ You have a choice to make, Shay.” Jaime and Carter’s words echo over and over in my head so much, I’ve memorized the tone each used.

I tell myself I’m going to countdown from three, and on three I’ll have my decision made.

One.

Two.

Three.

Got it.

Part 25?? The series is coming to an end, I’m thinking maybe 1 or 2 more chapters. Just in case I forget to say this: I want to thank everyone who’s been here from the first chapter. I had no idea people were going to be as invested in it as you guys are. Thank you guys so much. Thanks for reading another chapter!💕❤️